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Reflecting back on meeting my own “long distance relationship” in 1999 when the internet was young using dial-up internet, remember AOL? We are now married.


Okay so maybe that title is a little misleading. I’m not talking international relationships here so I apologise if you have been mislead. Sorry. But you can go now. Kay. I’m actually talking about Manchester to Leeds. It’s not that far but bear with me.


I have decided to embark upon a long distance relationship. I’m not saying this isn’t a ball ache because, well, it is. However this dynamic is not without merit.

Initially the distance was a reason not to get it together and to maintain the beloved “grey zone” but – unfortunately – there comes a point where this just won’t do. Sigh. Stupid feelings. I’m now trying to push this shit on everyone.

“What? That guy you’re texting lives too far away? Marry that man.”

“Aw, buddy – things not going well with the fella? Move away. It’ll make everything better.”

“Your boyf cheated on you? One…

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